Imagine

25 years ago today, John Lennon was mudered outside of his apartment building in New York. He was holding a set of tapes from a recording session he had earlier that night. The tapes became part of his eventual final album, Double Fantasy. Sometimes I get mad at Mark David Chapman for his senselessness. Sometimes I wish that I could have seen a 60-year-old Lennon in concert like I did Paul a few years back. But then I think about the global impact that his death had for peace, a lot like JFK. I stay mad, but at least it makes you think. I hate using generic phrases like that. It makes you think. But it does. And that legacy is stronger today than it might have been if he had lived. So tonight I will raise a glass to John Lennon, and open up the box set I have of his in iTunes. It will be coffee because I have a paper, but a glass will be raised nonetheless.

PS. I am quite tired, and I'd like to put that forward as a reason for the lack of style and grace that this post embodies. Or I could just be a sucky writer. Either one. But mostly with the tired. Yes.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Ain't This Place a Geographical Oddity: Two Weeks from Everywhere!

Hi all.

As my brother Peeg once said, "Its go time. Its now or never. A penny saved is a penny earned, and well, I'll be damned if I'm gonna loose a penny!"

These are the last two weeks of the semester, a veritable boiling furnace of work in which little sleep is had an much coffee imbibed. But you know what? I'm actually ready. I want to be done with all of this for awhile (i.e., Christmas break) and so I embrace the furnce, grimacing somewhat from the burn, but ready to hold on nonetheless.

The fact that I got to see so much family and eat so much food has helped. Over thanksgiving I saw family and friends, including Mr. Liam during his first birthday party, and it was very refreshing. Over the break Will hurt his ankle saving several children from a burning orphanage**, and I hope he is feeling better. That was bad, but the resulting trip to the drugstore produced several small transformers. I got Optimus Prime. He is, after all, the protector of all universal freedom.

So I really appreciate everyone's encouragement after the last post. I have felt like a bit of a whiner lately, and would like to say, "hey thanks" for everyone for listening. I know that I've had doubts about this over the last few years, as all graduate students do, but its time to do something about it. I've felt strongly about this since Grandpa's death in March, and no I can take the break to really make some plans. Thanks for allowing me my whine and cheese.

In other news, my new car ROX. She is not yet named, though Glove is in the front running (the character from yellow submarine). I hope to post pictures soon so everyone can offer suggestions, but for now just know that she's a dark blue 2006 Corolla 4-door stick. All input is most welcome.

I hope everyone is well!
Peace,
Joe

When this happens to a light bulb, you just replace it.

Burnt. Out.

How do you know when you are really burnt out? With a light bulb, you can just shake it to see if the filament is broken.

With me, I just see how long it takes me to read a single page of one of my more dry articles. The other day it took me nearly an hour to read 2 pages.

Crakle, crakle. Thats the sound of my motivation being burnt away.

You see, this semester I have defended my thesis, am working on my PhD comps, am a member of three labs (all with active research projects), am taking a full complement of classes, and am again dealing with stupid car problems.

Oh wait. Did I mention that? Yeah, well I bought a new car the other day. Its a 2006 Corolla. Lets just say I will never drive a Saturn again. If you'd like more details, please let me know. I think I may have exhausted that discussion topic last year, the last time a Saturn I owned basically blew up.

Anyway, I am doing all of these things, and the worst part is that I almost don't care about any of it right now. Whine Whine Whine. Should I have some cheese with my whine? Perhaps. Here we go:

The second worst part is that I feel extremely unappreciated in my own department. The third is that I am afraid this may not be the career for me. I have run into so much of the ugly underbelly of academia this semester it has me thinking I am not fit to be an academic. This may or may not be a good thing. But I'll tell you this: I'm tired of pouring my heart and mind out over issues that won't affect anyone for at least 10 years. I miss using my hands to fix things, and I still have that insatiable medical itch that I've had since I was small. I know I'm burnt out right now, but I've said these things before. So here's a question to those of you who know me: do you see me as an academic, doing esoteric research for the rest of my life in some very small office where I never cut my hair? Because that is starting to scare me. I want to help people. And I don't think I'm patient enough to do it where I'm so removed from, well, actual people. I want to get back into shape, too. I want to help people, be in shape, and do something that has a direct impact on the world.

So I've started gathering inforamtion in UAB's doctorate in physical therapy, with a specialization in stroke rehabilitation. Since its a doctorate, I'd still get to teach and do research, but mostly I'd help people. Hands on. And you don't get much more hands on than P.T. And that profession requires me to be in shape (lifting people and the like). So please tell me what you think.

I am now done with my whine. And cheese.

If you read all of this, thanks. And I'm sorry, too. This was not the most slap-happy installment of this blog. But to liven it up, here's a joke:

There are two hot dogs in a frying pan.
The first hot dog turns to the second and says, "Whew! It sure is hot in here."
The second looks at the first and screams, "Oh my god! Its a talking hot dog!"

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Spam This

Dear HOT TEEN FINANCE SHOW,
I'd just like to say that what you do is not nice. Even when you offer NEW LOW LOW RATES on your SUPER DEALS that include ZERO PERCENT FINANCING BUT ONLY NOW KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK I'LL BE BOOKMARKING YOU I am not interested. So, at Blogger's advice, I am turning on a verification process on comments.
You see, you are not a REAL HUMAN. You are some COMPUTER somewhere whose sole purpose it is to VIOLATE MY COMMENTS PAGE thus making me excited that someone has commented, only to end up attempting to fight my iBook in fury. Well, lets see if you can verify these words WITHOUT A SOUL. Because you have to read them. And that takes eyes. No amount of FREE LIMITED TIME ONLY CAKE can help you with that.
So to all those who actually wish to comment, you'll have to verify some word when you do. But keep in mind that this is to help save me from HOT TEEN FINANCE SHOW.

I hope everyone is well. Except the spammers, who I hope jam their toe just about now.

Peace,
Joe

Happy Birnfday To Da Peeg

I would like to take this opportunity in the halls of the interweb to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BROTHER DA PEEG!!! These words will float across the ocean via the magic of "computers" and "cables" to get to Da Peeg in Japan, where he will read them IN THE FUTURE!!! Its crazy like that.
So happy birthday my brother, enjoy your time IN THE FUTURE!!!

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

D-Fence! D-Fence!

Howdy all.

This morning I defended my master's thesis. I passed 5-0. And I didn't even use a sword.

Sadly, its time for another meeting. I will now go there confident in the extra letters after my name. Or something like that.

I hope everyone is well!
Peace,
Joe

Mountains, Gandalf, Mountains...

Happy day after your Anniversary to Da Peeg and Stacy, who got married on a mountain top in New Zealand two years ago (I hope). Every time I think of that wedding, I inevitably think of LOTR, and sometimes even put Gandalf in as the minister, even though I know it was a singing priestess lady. I have much to write about... I put my thesis on the table yesterday... I defend my thesis next wednesday... this past weekend was Fiddler's... but I have to go work now. That's right. Now that my thesis is done I can concentrate on my PhD comps. Oh happy yea.

I bet you can feel the excitment.

Feel it.

Anyway, I'll post about Fiddler's in more depth later. For now let me say congratulations to Dave and Donna, who got engaged :)

Now, I will excitedly go back to my comp document. Again, Oh Happy Yea.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Thesis, Shmesis... Its Time for Giant Corn Dog on a Stick

Why hello.
Have you ever realized that paper can be used to create a time bomb?

Well I have.

Right now my thesis is ticking away on two seperate hard drives, a virtual drive, and my flash drive. I turn it in next friday, at which point it will either explode or continue to be paper. Either one. But the potential is there!

And how have I been preparing for this deadline, you may ask? Well originally I was supposed to spend the weekend in South Carolina with Will, Meghan, Liam and Liz. But Ha Liz came down with a cold and we didn't want to pass it on, so we didn't go. A great opportunity to work, right? Why Yes! So I promptly went to Big Spring Jam in Huntsville and saw the Black Crows.

Let me explain how this was work: it wasn't.

Let me explain how this was fun: in every way.

On friday I drove with Tonya up to Athens and we hung out, watched family guy, and generally did not work. Saturday we lounged around and watched the football game (ROOOLLLLLL TIIIIIDEEE!!! 4-0), then met up with Shane and Michelle to see some rockin' bands. I must say that the Black Crows continuously rocked, and that they were well complimented by some giant corn dogs on a stick eaten on the side of the road. Classy. After the show Shane and I had a classic Shane and Joe moment. What was it, you ask? Come hang out with one of us (or both of us) and the story will inevitably come up.

Anyway, Sunday we made it to Mass and dinner at O'Chaley's, where I had the most mediocre ceaser salad EVER. At O'Chaley's. Not Mass. Ummm. Yeah. On the way over, Tonya said she wanted some soup... the loaded potato soup they have. When we got there, there was no soup. Tonya was sad. And rightfully so. Instead, they had a broccoli and cheese deal, which I ordered with my salad. After an inordinately long time, the waiter came back and explained that they were out of the other soups, too. Why? Well, here you go:

WAITER: "When we ran out of potato soup they just dumped everything else out, too."

Perfect. Sense.

ALL SOUP OR NO SOUP!!! ALL SOUP OR NO SOUP!!! I didn't know that O'Chaley's was communist. It sounds Irish to me. But there you have it. Equal opportunity soup dumping.

Then they brought me my salad, and it had no croutons. I know this sounds picky, but in the description it said, "nice, crispy croutons." I wanted some crisp in my otherwise mushy salad, ok? So the nice waiter brought me a small bowl of croutons. They were stale.

The beginning of the week has been spent making up for this good time by pouinding out 12 to 14 hour days. But good news! I finished collecting MY FINAL DATA and I'll analyze it tonight, have a semi-final draft by saturday and then turn it in after Jamie's corrections next friday. The minute that last copy hits the desk I am off to Fiddler's. I can't wait. It'll be the sweetest Fiddler's ever, as I will be thesis free (at least until the formal defense on the 19th). I think I'm singing "Long Black Veil" again, since I've had no time to learn anything new.

Tick... tick... tick...

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

I'm A Modern Classic

Two pretty funny things today. The other day a friend and fellow grad student, Henry, pointed me toward a movie test that he actually wrote online. It is quite thorough and a lot of fun (although I didn't know what many the references were to). This is how my test turned out:

New and Improved You scored 41 Golden Classic, 60 Awesome Remake, 33 Needs No Change, and 11 Infomercial!

Wow, what a pleasant surprise. You are a remake of an incredible classic. Yet, not only do you not suck, you have really brought some new and exciting elements to the film. We are going to buy you as soon as you come out on DVD, as a matter of fact, we are going to buy the double disc set. And then should the criterion collection company release a special edition of you, we will also buy that DVD, and give the original one away to someone who we dont really care that much about, otherwise we would have bought them the new one.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on Golden Classic You scored higher than 99% on Awesome Remake You scored higher than 99% on Needs No Change You scored higher than 0% on Infomercial

Link: The Gold Classic or Glitzy Remake Test written by diamondslacker on Ok Cupid

Geez, I hope that worked. Anyway, you should try it too. Look at me, I'm James Earl Jones!

Secondly, another friend and fellow grad student, Chris, sent me the following article about shaving. You don't think that would be that funny or exciting, right? No you should read this. Seriously.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930

So otherwise things are pretty busy. Thesis gets turned in in three weeks!!! AHHHHH!!!!

Let me say that again. AHHHHHH!!!!!

Despite this, I am relatively unstressed. Who can say how this works? Not me. Well maybe I can, but thats for later.

Time to grade some papers.

I hope everyone is well!
Peace,
Joe

Better Tennis for Boys and Girls

I realized just now that I had not yet given an official "shout out" to the newest addition to the family, a mister Maddox. You can read more about his wonderful cuteness and how he came about on my cousin Danni's site (see the links to the right). I would like to amerliorate the no shout out situation. Here we go. Wait for it... SHOUT! OUT! MADDOX! I think thats the way thats done. Hmmm. Maybe I should just say "welcome to the family, Maddox" and "I'm very glad that you and Danni are happy and healthy" and "it was a true joy to hold you." So I will, and there you go. AND the shout out.

(and now, an abrupt transition)

So I seem to have turned into a vampire. Over the course of the last few weekends I have stayed up until 6 or 7 in the morning on 3 seperate occasions, the last two on two nights in a row. I have not grown funny teeth, been imbued with a great sense of fashion, or taken on a liking for the blood, so its not that serious, I think. But still. Vampire. Yeah. It could be that, or it could be that each time I was up hanging out with some very awesome folks. Or maybe one folk. Or maybe I just wanted to say up late enough to watch lots of infomercials. Wait, whats the singular form of folks? Anyway, its probably the hanging out thing. But the vampire explanation is cooler, and Occam's Razor ( http://pespmc1.vub.ac.be/OCCAMRAZ.html ) does not apply to my website. The principle of Cool Stories does, though.

Yesterday I ended one such all nighter (at Shane's; yes, there was some hot tub involved. And maybe some drinking. Don't be alarmed!) by sleeping for a few hours and then going to mass at the Cathedral with my parents and Liz and Josh. A partner in my all night escapades, Tonya (see the reference to maybe one folk), also came to mass and got to stay for lunch, too. The Cathedral is giving away a bunch of old stuff from the school in preparation for some renovations, and Liz, Tonya, and I all went to check out the treasures. There were old shelves, records, and the like, but the real catches were found in the old books. We found such literary classics as "Lets Go to the Middle East!" (found by Liz), "How to Build Robots" (found by Tonya) and even "Gale Sayers, All-Star Runingback." (found by me and given to my dad). I also found "Better Tennis for Boys and Girls", one in a series of sports guides. My favorite though was an instructional book on how to shoot a set shot in basketball, something that hasn't been taught since before I was born. It included such instructions as "your body must be under control" and "you shouldn't even try shooting until the second half of your seventh grade year, as you will not have developed sufficient strength or coordination to shoot the ball into the goal." It is, I must say, TOTALLY AWESOME!!! The Robot book was a close second, talking quite a bit about how robots were fast becoming common in the home (like "microcomputers"), and that if it seemed like too much of a bother to build your own robot you could always just buy one. You know, at your local robot store. It was a great weekend capped by an equally great day.

And to set things up for the week, the other day Nick bought Milo's sweet tea, Little Debbie Jelly Rolls, and a Pony Keg of Grolsch. You have to prepared for the studying, you know, and Nick seems to have found a combination of stuff for all the possibilites of studying:
1) Milo's for fuel (still too hot for coffee)
2) Little Debbie for the inevitable snacking that accompanies hours of reading
3) 5 liters of good beer for when you give up and play LOTR Return of the King (tm).
He's a right smart young man, I tell you.

Well, its time to go back to an annotated bibilography on aging and working memory. A glass of Milo's awaits.

I hope everyone is well!
Peace,
Joe

Hurricane Katrina

In light of recent events down here in the South, I haven't found words to post here. I can say the the hurricane touched as far north and east as T-town, and that Nick and I were without power for about 5 days. During those five days we actually hosted a fwe friends from the New Orleans area. But thank God for no power, compared to the surreal destruction that increases exponentially the closer you get to New Orleans. There are almost 600 refugees in the Recreation Center here in town, and another couple hundred in various shelters. Its a juxtaposition thats almost indescribable to see UA students working out on weights just a few yards from someone's 2 by 8 feet of Red Cross provided home on the basketball court. I worked at the shelter the other night, and did a couple of head counts during the early morning hours when everyone was still asleep. A few people stirred and smiled... more than I think I could muster in their position.
I'll post again soon.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

You're Getting Sleepy...

Well I'm not.

I seem to have forgotten how to sleep.

This has been going on for about two weeks now, and I have tried many things: working out, hot tea, hot milk, hot sauce...

Well, maybe the hot sauce was not to sleep. But you should have tasted the last cheesy tortilla I made. Sweet sassy Mo-lassy.

And so, dear reader, I beseech thee to let me in on some sleeping secrets. Most of you are family, and so I think have probably experienced similar times. It is like a very stroing type of apathy at the end of the day where I can turn my brain off but at the same time can't push myself up out of the muck to practice my normal bedtime routine. The result? Lots of delicious cheesy tortillas and not too many good restful nights. Like right now its 11:30pm and I am not tired. I have to get up in the morning. I have work. Sleep helps at work. I know. But still, the cruel mistress, she eludes me.

And I know I am a psychology student, and I know all about the importance of routine and calming my mind and not focusing too much on the next day and all that. I know. But just as doctors make the worst patients, I am loathe to take my own good advice.

And you know what? I like to sleep. Really. Waking up in a warm bed on a cold morning with the promise of NPR (yes, I said it, and yes, I know: GO GO GO) and a hot cup of coffee is always great. And I love to sit on my porch in the morning with said coffee and said news and ease into the day.

So as you can see, I have answered my own questions logically. But this restlessness is far from the warm womb of logic. So someone please do one of the following:
a) tell me how to sleep
b) give me a million bazillion dollars.

You CAN pick both, as they are not mutally exclusive.

Maybe the sandman is mad at me. I do lock all of my doors at night, and Julie might have licked him the last time he was here. Being a mythical creature in charge of human mental restoration, I imagine he doesn't like being licked by strange cats.

Hmmm.

I that was odd. I know. Sorry. Maybe I should TRY AND GO GET SOME SLEEP!!!

Its like a greased pig. A greased Uber-Pig that is fast and mischevious. I'm talking about sleep. And how it is hard to catch.

As my brother Will has said, "I am lugubrious."

I hope everyone is well, and rested.
Peace,
Joe

Controversial Topic!!!

Hmmm...

It seems that blogger has opened up its titles to search engines that then open up avenues for the spamming. IN THE COMMENTS (see my last posts comments)! I have a mind to go back to my old comments script and see what happens. As you can see, I've "baited the hook" with a hot issue in this post's title.

We'll see...

Peace,
joe

Once you go Mac, You Never Go Back

Let me tell you something.

No, seriously, you should prepare. Have a seat. Get a cup of tea.

My new computer is incredible.

Wait, not incredible. Its like Magic. Some brand of magic I always suspected should come with such expensive technology as a computer, but never saw until I became a Mac user last week.

Thats right, a Mac user. I know it sounds like I now use drugs or something, or that I am part of a cult. But let me tell you something. Um, again. I now completely understand why Macs are so cultish and why their faithful are well, so faithful.

Last week I purchased a new iBook G4, 1.33 GHz with 1 Gb RAM and a 60 Gb Hard drive. Not too fancy considering todays computing standards, but a huge and bounding leap from my old PC. ("Stan" had been with me since early college, and I had maxed out his RAM @ 256 MB. Yes, I said maxed out). My new iBook is so pretty and so fast and so EASY TO USE (yep, I busted that out early) that I can't believe its a computer. Like I said, it is some sort of magic. And believe me, its not just the update in tech that makes this so amazing. The OS is so simple, and beautiful, and quiet, and fast. The computer itself is small, perfectly proportioned, and well, nice to look at. Yeah, I admit it. "The design isn't that important" I once said. But now it is. Carrying this thing around makes me look and feel like a Stealth Ninja Polar Bear. You heard me.

Anyway, as the title indicates, I will never again venture into the land of the PC. I was afraid that my comfort with the aforementioned Windows Boxes might make this transition hard. Ummm, no. It just makes me sad I didn't do this earlier.

No, I am not going to make out with my iBook. So stop thinking that. STOP IT.

Oh, one more thing. I have finished my project of building a new computer desk for my new computer using the doors of Grandma and Grandpa's old kitchen cabinets. It turned out pretty well, if I do say so myself. I'll have pictures up soon.

RANT RANT RANT.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

I am a Ninja, goo goo ga joob.

Hmmm... I haven't posted in awhile, and a good bit has happened. First, congratualtions to Matt and Deidre, who got married last week and are now somewhere cruising toward Jamaica on a large boat. The wedding was beautiful and the bachelor party was awesome. Think about it this way: at one point one of the attendees (at the bachelor party) thought that the clear liquid they were drinking was water. It was in fact gin. Good gin at that. Now I see what happened to all those flappers. I had the honor of being an usher at the wedding itself, and that was much more fun than you might initially think. I got to sweep one of the doors open when Deidre appeared at the back of the church, and that was mighty special. I also escorted several good looking ladies up the aisle to their seats, which wasn't so bad either.

Before the wedding I got the chance to take an actual vacation up to Athens and Anderson. My friends Carl and David generally figured out all the mysteries of the world along with me over some good drinks, and I bought some very nice used books. This is, you see, exciting stuff for me. I spent the last half of the week with my brother and sister-in-law and nephew. There I relaxed, defeated the forces of darkness, displayed my considerably mad street ball skillz (I brought the PS2 and Will and I played it. Alot.), and got to hang out with the coolest baby ever. Liam and I played a game called jump, which he learned from his jumping chair:

I love getting to spend time up there with Will and Meghan and Liam. Hopefully I will be going back before too long.

Also a congratualtions is in order to my friend Drew, who now has a fancy job and fancy apartment in Birmingham. We've spent some good times there already:

Don't worry, I am highly trained at looking like a ninja.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

HAPPY ^&*%$&*^ing BIRTHDAY!

Happy Birthday to my boy Shane, who today turns sweet sixteen. Or older. Who can say? The point is its the man's birthday, and its time to go celebrate.

I hope everyone is well
(And Shane I hope you're ready for your party)
Peace,
Joe

bold new look, same great product!

Hi.

ITS REDESIGN MADNESS HERE AT JOE'S OFFICE!!!

As you can see, I've changed Mr. T. Loves Buddha. Note the address has not changed, and that Mr. T. does indeed still love Buddha. I thought it was time to "shake things up."

::SHAKE. SHAKE::

I have also changed my home page design (take a look), and hope to soon match this up with its general theme. I am playing around with this new title, too. Please, do tell me what you think.

Thanks are in order to Da Peeg and Stacy. They have me AN OPTIMUS PRIME THAT TURNS INTO A FREAKING LION!!! HE WILL EAT YOUR FACE FOR JUSTICE!!! As you can tell, it has made me happy. Between that and the PS2 I bought the other day, things are looking quite nerdy, er, I mean up.

I'd also like to thanks everyone who commmented on my last post. I am compiling a list right now. Soon I will be the SMARTEST MAN ON EARTH. Or at least will have a healthly dose of insomnia coupled with eye strain. Whichever.

So, question of the day: Redesigns are good or bad? I plan on customizing this site when I have more time (tehe. I made a joke. Time? Get it?)

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

I am on a quest.

As most everyone knows these days, I have been, well, a bit disgruntled you might say. Restless. And just a few weeks ago my life sort of switched gears a little (see previous post). And by a little I mean alot.

And by restless I mean anxious. And by anxious I mean ready for something. What? I'm not sure. I nice ice cream cone perhaps. A walk. The new Nickel Creek Album. More likely though, I am ready for a change.

You see, I fear change. I dare say most people in my family aren't too keen on it, and I am a wonderful example of that lack of keenness. In fact, I might have the opposite of keenness for it. I'm not sure quite what that is, but I think I have it. A type of anti-keenness born of a whole bunch of change thrown at me like a wet blanket when I wasn't looking.

Change #1: I am considering a break from school. At least, my current program. Not a permanent thing, mind you, and not until this time next year, but a change. I have been in school for 19 straight years now. What's next, you might ask? Not sure. I'll be applying for the Rhodes (again) and a Fulbright fellowship. Maybe I can be a roadie on the next Nickel Creek tour. Maybe I'll go to more school, just for something else. Like Medical School. Why, Joe? You might ask. Well, this is because of change #2: Grandpa's death. I went to Grad School to help people with strokes. Through an unfortunate and unforseeable sequence of events, I haven't done that for the last two years. And it looks like where I am now is not the best place for it. And my sudden enthusiasm for personal challenge sprouts partly from change #3: Jenn's breaking up with me. To be completely honest, I was forming the next few years around being able to be with her, and being able to follow her. Since this no longer applies (see previous post), I am more gung-ho about getting out there and doing something else. "Out there" could be many places. "Something else" could be alot of things.

But anyway, back to the quest: All of this has inspired in me a sort of want-to-be smarty-pants-ness such as I haven't had since attending my dear old Alma Mater. There I began a classic, liberal arts education. The problem is, I don't think I finshed it. So my quest is to at least continue it by reading. I am (no joke) currently working my way through Einstein's Relativity and need more once I finish. I am thinking things like Cicero, Augustine, Virgil, general histories of things (like presidents) and the like. You know, things I probably have no business reading. Any suggestions are most welcome, about any of this. Let old Joe know.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Its very odd what things can bring consolation in bad times. The other night Nick and I went to Buffet City, a resturant of epic portions. You see, my brother Peeg was the Mayor of Buffet City when he was here in T-town; naturally Nick and I had to go and attempt to make at least councliman. I think we succeeded. And during the process I felt ok about things for a few minutes, other than the growing lump of delicious fullness developing in my stomach.
Felt ok about what? you may be asking. Well, I have posted some pretty personal things here, as my readership is mostly if not all family and friends. So if you are neither, than you might find the following neither amusing nor particularly happy. I'd find another blog to read.
On saturday after my cousin Danni's baby shower, Jenn called from Colorado and broke up with me. Yep. I wish I had more to write about it, but I'm still, well, I don't know. Thats just the point. For a person who loves to talk and can usually comment on anything, I can't find words for this. I am, well... these are bad times.
I've kept up with work, though not too effectively. If anyone has any sage advice for me, I welcome it. Take note that there was no animosity between us, that she is one of the best friends I have ever had, and that my feelings for her have not changed. Her feelings for me changed, though. And this is the result.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

My very good friend David came to visit last week. We did many fun things, including my first viewing of Napoleon Dynamite, and my introduction to one of the most rediculously entertaining flash cartoons ever. Be warned: you may never get this out of your head.

Ever.

That said, Go Here.

We had an excellent time. As a reference to the above link, David would intermittently pet Julie (a cat) while softly singing, "Its peanut butter kitty time" to himself.

A good time.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

There is so much to say in this post that I feel I should prepare a lecture, with charts and graphs and a bulleted outline, so that each point may be covered in a full and fair manner.

But I won't.

Instead, I'll ramble. Those of you who know me well understand that this is a gift of mine, the rambling. And, usually, this leads to some great conclusion that invloves many of the fractious parts leading up to it. This, then, is in what I consider to be come vague correlate of temporal progression. Onward, I say.

1) Peeg and Stacy came to visit. For more complete accounts of what happened, see their blogs (linked on the right of this page). All I have to say is that the day they were in T-Town we had the perfect eating day: City Cafe for Lunch, Dreamland for Dinner, and Krispy Kreme for dessert. Oh my yes.

2) I finished my second year of graduate school. I pulled a 4.0 this semester, and my thesis will be done by the end of the summer. I have my comprehensive exam paper underway, and a dissertation idea is a-brewin'. AND I am still alive.

3) I saw Will get his Master's degree. Let me tell you something: my brother is an amazing person. In one year (thats the number 1) he has quit his old job, had a son with Meghan, gotten his Master's degree, and gotten a new job. AND he's still alive, too. Also LIAM IS THE BEST NEPHEW AND CUTEST BABY EVER. No contest. Seriously. Cutest. Ever.

4) Jenn and I celebrated 2 years together. I am a lucky, lucky man. She has yet to get tired of me, and the fact that we live four hours from eachother (She's at Vanderbilt Divinity School) hasn't stopped us either. And yes, you can enter the audience "awwww" track here. Mushy mushy.

5) Jenn and I went to Colorado for a week! We had an unbelievable time. I learned a few things from the trip, too. First, Kansas is flat. And long. Second, I can wear sandals above the fire ant line! Third, I want to teach at CU. Fourth, I love to hike and camp. I never really had the chance to find that out until I got to a place where I wasn't staring at the ground the whole time, looking for ants. And there's a lot to see besides the ground where we went. Like Lost Lake and Lily Mountain. We also stayed in a little Mountain Town called Nederland. Everyone there drives some sort of Subaru. No lie. On the day we left the town I counted 15 just on our way out. The whole reason for the trip was to drop Jenn of in Rocky Mountain National Park, where she's a Ranger in the Back Country Permit office. I hate that she'll be gone for three months, but I love that she's living out a dream of hers. It would be like someone paying me to play basketball or to be in a band with Will. She's been there now a week, and the last time I talked with her she said "I'm happy" in about the happiest voice imaginable. And I don't blame her. You should see the view from her cabin. We took many pictures, and I'll post some as soon as she can get them to me. She's looks purty nice in that uniform, I tells ya. Even if the pants are from 1983.

6) For number six I will put the many things I have inevitably left out. Fell free to fill in the blank here with adventures of your choice. But not too many. I have alot to do this summer.

And a few belated things for my relatives: Happy Birthday to Aunt Gayna, and Happy Anniversary to Will and Megahn.

Hmmmm... what else. Just now I ate some "Tabasco Hot and Spicy Cheez-its" as my afternoon snack in the office. They are good.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

One of the things I study in grad school is our ability to manipulate the perception of time. In general, people feel closer to acheivements and farther away from failures, regardless of actual temporal distance (to a certain point). What I don't yet understand is, how does the clock on my computer go so fast sometimes and so slow others?

You know what I'm talking about. Like on the cartoons when the kid is waiting for the school clock to hit 3pm, and the minute hand keeps inching slower and slower as the time approaches. Well, the opposite can also happen, like when you are hopelessly procrastinating. Like I am now. I came to my office to get a good amount of work done and then BAM!!! Its almost 6pm. What.

I am dumbfounded. I am dumblosted. I know that I need to get this document done so that I can pack for my awesome trips coming up. I know that. But that is just the thing. When I start thinking about my motivation, I get distracted. Case in point: I just spent five minutes looking at the soles of my new hiking boots, trying to figure out how my weight is distributed across them when I take a step.

If anyone has a cure, please let me know. I might start analyzing the composition of my socks next.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Niether Sleet Nor Snow Nor Dark of Night...
Jenn and I went to an Earth Day celebration this weekend in Nashville, and old Ma Nature was in a bit of a drisly (is that a real word?) mood. But did we get discouraged? No! We wrapped up against the rain and ate funnel cake, hot corn on the cob, and learned about houses you can make out of staw and mud. On top of all that, we saw Mindy Smith for the second time in as many years, but this time she was only like 15 feet away. The rain chased most folks off, so we laid a blanet down (it was water-proof) right in front of the stage, and watched her and her band stick it out in the cold and wet to put on an awesome show. And we didn't even know she was going to play when we decided to go.
The next day (Sunday) I went to see Jenn's choir sing Mozart's Requiem at her church. Sakes alive, that little man sure could write the music. And sakes alive, my baby sure can sing. It was beautiful. Especially the Lacrimosa.
On another note, as many of you know (and if you didn't before, you do now) I am thinkning about getting into end-of-life care in my current studies. So, against my better psychometric judgement, I took an online personality test to see what I should be. Here are the results:

Outgoing (E) 72.22% Withdrawn (I) 27.78% Imaginative (N) 60% Realistic (S) 40% Emotional (F) 57.89% Intellectual (T) 42.11% Organized (J) 58.82% Improvised (P) 41.18% Your type is: ENFJ You are a Persuader, possible professions include - entertainer, recruiter, artist, newscaster, writer/journalist, recreation director, librarian, facilitator, politician, psychologist, housing director, career counselor, sales trainer, travel agent, program designer, corporate/team trainer, child welfare worker, social worker (elderly services), interpreter/translator, occupational therapist, executive

Take Free Career Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

So, all you friends and loved ones out there... does this seem to fit me? Or should I chase my lifelong dream of becoming Mr. T? (umm, yeah.)

Suggestions and comments are most welcome.
I hope everyone is doing well.
Peace,
Joe

White Smoke today.

I'm not sure what to think, either. God Bless the new pope. I know that his election came from a great amount of thinking, praying, and consideration of the church's direction in the future from a great many holy people.

But I point your attention to a paragraph from the above - linked article. It reads:

"In the Vatican, he (the new pope) has been the driving force behind crackdowns on liberation theology, religious pluralism, challenges to traditional moral teachings on issues such as homosexuality, and dissent on such issues as women's ordination."

Not exactly progressive. Hmmm.

His predecessor in name was influential in WWI. Here's a short description.

Being a young, western Catholic in the modern world can be a confusing thing. I wonder what will come of this new time in leadership.

Off to read...

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

After many moons of waiting, I got an email today from the National Science Foundation. In december I asked them for a whole bunch of money. Today they told me, ummm, no.

It seems that my application may have been disqualified on a technicality. I hope that they dismissed me on the lack of personal merit, not on whether I put my name in the right place. I have placed an inqiry. I guess I'll post when I find out.

This is all to say that I'll have to go back to selling Lemonade and picking up cans off the side of the road in order to fund graduate school. I'm not bitter. But the Lemonade might be.

Stupid academic world of jockying for money. At least with a 9 to 5 job I'd know how much I was making at the end of the day.

::sigh::

::audience laugh track lets out a big "awwwww"::

I hope everyone is well, and not at the monetary mercy of a large government agency.

Peace,
Joe

Imagine, if you will, a small animal that looks a little like a dog.

Its wearing a shirt that says "Work."

Now imagine that the small dog-like animal would not leave you alone no matter what you did. No treat or amount of coaxing will lead it astray. Yelling in frustration makes it get closer.

I am in that situation right now, and have been now for many weeks. Please, if you know how to get rid of this, let me know.

Outside of this unfortunate stalking, I have some thanks to hand out:
1) Thanks to Jenn for my super stylin' clothes for my birthday. I now own more stylish shirts than I think should be assigned to me, and can look more like I belong next to my beautiful girlfriend.

2) Thanks to my siblings, who got me an iPod Shuffle for my birthday. It, in one word, ROCKS. Along with my new clothes, I exert an overall style that could have many people fooled as to my actual incredible nerdiness.

3) Thanks to my Aunt Gayna, who got me a Mandolin (I have the sunburst finish) for my birthday. I have learned two songs, three chords, and one full scale. I hope to have a song or two ready for fiddler's this year so I can go on stage and pretend that I am Chris Thile.

Also, congratulations to Jenn for getting a summer job at Rocky Mountain National Park at the back-country permits office. Those are some lucky hikers, I tell you.

AND Happy Birthday to:
David
Drew
Carl

and many more to come...

Remember, if you know how to get the small dog-like creature to even let me sleep, I'll pay you like a bazillion dollars to let me know. Or a few of my canadian pennies. Whichever.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

They say its my birthday...

Howdy, all. 24-year-old Joe here. I wanted to post and say thanks to the many people who have already made my birthday supa keen. I had a party on Sunday (thanks Mama and Daddy and Father and Lonelle and Nick and Liz and Josh!) where I received some great books. Jenn sent me The Whites Stripes Elephant along with a CD or bluegrass renditions of many White Stripes songs (awesome!) so I would have something to open on my birthday... smart, gorgeous, AND thoughtful; whadda gurl! Then in Perception today the folks in my program had a card and cupcakes for me... they were easter cupcakes with Bunny rings, and yes, I am wearing some right now.

Good times. Peeg called me from Tomorrow this morning, too! My siblings say they have a big thing waiting for me at home this weekend for easter. Will didn't want to give it up, so it should be great!

Material things aside, the phone calls, cards, etc. have been the best. Its always a great thing to be reminded of your huge family and great friends (insert audience sigh here).

In other news, I saw a SUV with a disturbing bumper sticker yesterday. It read:

"My SUV can beat up your Prius."

I don't have time to rant right now, because its my birthday. So I encourage everyone to do so for me in the Comments section below.

Thanks again to everybody, and I hope I didn't miss anything. If I did, I'll give you a bunny cupcake.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Last Wednesday morning at 6:28am, Grandpa went home.

In an amazing week I saw all of my immediate family in one place at one time, and watched one of my heroes go on to greater reward. We were there with him each moment, right up until the last. I have never seen someone pass away so beautifully; not just this last week of illness but for the last few years.

Grandpa taught me more than I can recall now; how to fish, work on cars, pray without talking, tell the truth... so many things. Lastly he taught me (and everyone else) what it was to have dignity when society assigns you none. His bravery, spirit, warmth, and quiet determination to suffer with grace were beyond inspiring. His dedication to family and God was the stuff of memoirs and books about fictional characters. But Grandpa was real. Every bit of him.

This week reminded me with alternating joy and pain that I am a part of an incredible family. I don't have words for how much I love and respect each member of it. From Grandpa on down to Liam, I still learn from and am in awe of each of my kin.

To my family: thanks for the last week. I don't think any of us would have gotten through it alone.

To my other loved ones: thanks for demonstrating that some family doesn't have the presupposition of the relation of blood.

To Grandpa: Enjoy your rest. I love you.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

The fever's gone. The fever's goooone away.

Thats right, I'm back from the land of the ill. In fact, I came back much faster than usual for me. You see, I have taken up what I call the "Nick Method" of getting well. At the first real sign of an illness, you go to sleep. For a day. A whole day. I'm not saying to sleep in. I'm saying sleep for like 24 hours. Well in this case I slept for two days, and was pretty much over the flu in two days. That and the nurse gave me a giant shot in my boo-honkus. Ouch, but yay! I felt even better then. That was Wednesday. My weekend adventure started the next day.

On thursday I put in a whole day of work and the normal stuff. Then I drove to Nashville. Jenn and I went out for a while and had a good ol' time with some close friends. The next day we drove to Memphis to see her sister play in her last college game ever. Before getting to the gym, we stopped @ Subway. Pretty normal. On the way out of the parking lot, however, I pulled a Joe. I backed up EVER SO SLOWLY AND CAREFULLY (I am notoriously "granny" when I drive). Well, I backed carefully right up into another car. Um, yeah. So after alarming poor Jenn, I got out and attempted to find the owner of the parked car. It was very old and dirty, and had out-of-date plates. After going into every store in that little strip mall and making an idiot out myself ("Hey! Is anybody the owner of this car? Because I ran into it."), I couldn't find the owner. So I took down the plate number, left a note to the effect of, "I ran into your car very slowly. Sorry. Here's my info" and we went to the game. Even though Jillian's team lost, it was fun. She's a great basketball player. More on that later. In the meantime, during half time, I called the Memphis PD to tell them about the car. They ran the plates and they were WAY OUT OF DATE. We're talking years, here. Anyway, that means one of a few things:
1) I ran into an abandonded car
2) I ran into a stolen car
3) I ran into the car, but the owners don't want it to be known that the plates are so out of date, so they didn't report it.

Anyway, they haven't called me yet.

Back to the weekend...
After the game and taking Jillian to pick up her stuff from the hotel, Jenn and I took a walk around the Rhodes campus and then headed to the campsite where we'd stay. We stopped at this little greasy spoon place that was both a gas station AND a diner. That was the second such place that day. Earlier, on the way to Memphis, we stopped at a Gas Station / Diner/ MARINA. Yup.
Anyway, we ate a wonderful dinner, then set up camp down the road. Her parents came later and set up their RV. The next morning we got up and had a famous Compton Family "westy" breakfast (Westy is what they call their RV.) We then went into town and had AWESOME Bar-B-Q @ a place called Rezendevous BBQ. We walked around Beale street for awhile, which we need to go back to when we have more time. Oh, and we also saw the famous Peabody Ducks. I will let the link explain. It was cool, in that "Why?" sort of way.

Then back to Nashville. There we worked, worked, and worked. Then Jenn surprised me with Sushi before I drove home in the Wind, Rain, and Fog. I took these three things as a sign I shouldn't have left Nashville. But alas, there's work to be done.

Wow. BABBLE BABBLE BABBLE!!! But I had somehting to write about other than school. So there you go.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Today, I will tell you some useful facts about fevers.

1) When you have a fever, you should not trust your sense about what time of day it is. Currently it is 1:48pm, and I feel as if it is somehow last night.

2) When you have a fever, you should not trust your sense of where dreams stop and reality starts. Evidence: right before this post I was talking to Julie, the cat. And she was talking back. Normal, right? She was wearing a suit and speaking English with a heavy Spanish accent. Hmmmm...

3) Fevers make you hungry. Yet somehow, eating in your fever dreams satisfies that hunger. Evidence: I just ate a bunch of pancakes that we don't have. While talking to Julie.

4) When you have a fever, you apparently forget what a bed is. Evidence: After talking to Julie and eating Pancakes, I woke up on the floor.

5) Fevers over 102 degrees are bad. Like mine, which is 103 today.

6) AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

oh yes, and

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SISTER HA LIZ!!!!

Yesterday, that is.

Peace,
Joe

Last night, as I squeezed the last of the toothpaste from the tube, I wondered,

"How much toothpaste is thrown away each year?"

Think about it. How many people out there really take the time to squash down the used portion of the tube until it is razor-flat just to get the very most toothpaste possible for your shopping dollar?

I know I do. But then again, I am odd in oh so many ways.
So that got me thinking about wasted toothpaste.

I bet there is someone somewhere that knows how much paste is wasted each year. Some statistician, not unlike myself, who takes pleasure in knowing such things. I bet further that this person works for some company or group that crusades against such waste. There are crusades for everything, so why not toothpaste wastage?

Maybe their name is something like People Against the Wasting of Toothpaste, or PAWT. Even better, maybe they are the Association Against the Wasting of Toothpaste, or AAWT. Say it with me, now: AAWT.

AAAAWWWTTTT.

Others obviously think like I do about these things. Just ask Stephani W.

Or those plucky folks who MAKE IT THEMSELVES.

I hope everyone is well.

Peace,
Joe

Do you ever find yourself bargaining with inanimate objects?

Well I do.

This morning I was taking a shower (so fresh and so clean, clean) when the water started to get colder. A common event in the winter, but today I wanted to end on a warm note. So, (outloud, mind you), I said

"Hey! I need more hot water. C'mon, you know we both want this to end well."

Shocked at myself for talking with the shower I follwed up this brilliant comment with,

"Holy crap. I just talked to the shower." (Again, outloud).

At this point, two facts occured to me:

1) The shower cannot hear me. Even if it could, it probably would not speak English, more likely some sort of appliance language, whatever that may be.

2) There was no point in lamenting my attempt at communication with a shower outloud at all, since no one was there but me.

So that is the way my day started. How was yours?

I hope everyone is well,
Peace,
Joe

What a weekend.

Imagine the following as a headline in your local newspaper:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CHANDLER DOES MORE IN TWO DAYS THAN IN THE PREVIOUS SEVEN
February 7th

Joe Chandler had a busy weekend. Starting friday night he saw his girlfriend, worked a full day @ Mercedes, drove 6 hours to South Carolina, celebrated his oldest brothers birthday and Nephew's baptism, slept (a little) and drove back home in time for a full slate of meetings and class today.

"I'm pretty tired." he said today when caught face down at his office desk.

He denied having been sleeping in his office, claiming that the long string of "aaaaaa" on the computer screen was a grant proposal, not the result of his large head laying on the keyboard.

This is the first documented case where Mr. Chandler has gotten more done in two days than in the previous seven.

When asked how he did it, Mr. Chandler responded by mumbling something that sounded like, "mmmm, ham. No, no. Just five more minutes."

It remains to be seen if he can equal that produtivity in the coming days.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All true, I tells ya. And it is a grant proposal, damnit.

I had an incredible time this weekend. Jenn and I relaxed and cooked the Matar Panir ( an Indian dish that changes each time we cook it) on Friday night. D. LISH. The next day Nick and I worked a full day at Mercedes. Yep. Now Nick is in on it, too. Sunday we drove to Anderson for a combination Will Birthday / Liam Baptism. It was a wonderful time. Great food (as always), good churchin'. Peeg and Stacy were missed, but they called that night. They went to some crazy amusment park INSIDE in Japan. I hope they post about it. Liam was awesome during the actual Baptism, and I got to stand in as Godfather proxy (Fr. Donoho couldn't make it). Its always great to see so many loved ones in one weekend. Good times.

I think I'm going to get back to my "grant" now ("aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa")

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

To think that its been 15 days since I last posted is a little crazy. These first few weeks of the semester have been just a little busy, and by that I mean I have barely found time to put on my pants in the morning.

Don't worry, I found time.

Due to my finely honed scientific mind (sharp as silly putty, I tells ya), I have picked out a pattern in school. Each semester gets harder. At the end of the semester sitting in my recliner @ home, I think: "That sure was tough. It can't get much tougher, I guess." Then the next semester starts and a small man in a green three piece suit (he is reality, you see) walks up and hands me a telegram that reads:

Dear Mr. Chandler,
This semester is going to be harder than the last.
Love,
Learning.

Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining. Just pointing out the fact that things don't get easier, you just get better at doing things. It is AN ILLUSION OF THE MIND! And I have figured it out. Now if I could just get the second part down (that is, getting better)...

In other news, George Bush is still president. Among other things, this has caused me to hate the Sesame Street Episode that is brought to you by the letter "W."

U2 is going on tour soon and Jenn and I are laying down the moola to go see them in Chicago. I am, as they say, "pumped." It will allow me to cross off yet another concert from my "Joe's Super Dream Concert List." I have already seen Paul McCartney and Bob Dylan. Now U2. Who reamins, you ask? REM, among others. You here that, Stipe? Gets to touring.

Speaking of cool bands, my friend Matt introduced me to one called Blue Merle this past week. He described them as a "mix between Nickel Creek and Coldplay." Aptly said. Check them out @ www.bluemerle.net

Speaking further about music I like, The Shins and The Postal Service have both become regulars in my driving rotation. Its difficult for me to like new bands (consider the Super Dream Concert List mentioned above), but lately I have been introduced to a few by friends. I like the Shins so much at this point that I officially rocked out to them in the car the other day. An Official Rocking Out Session involves being caught by another person @ a stop light (or sign, if you like) while rocking out (in-car boogie dancing, singing in an unnecessarily loud manner, acting as if you are a member of the band). I was doing just that when I looked to my left and a family of four was watching me. You know what the best part was? The song rocked too much to stop. Oh. Yeah.

It is time now to go and help give a workshop on how to use Microsoft Excel for general science research. Notice that this was not included in the letter from Learning above.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

Hey. Look at this.

Ano Novo Feliz Todos!

Yep. Its 2005. And yes, that is Portuguese. I thought it might add some flavor to the post. Tasty Portuguese flavor. Enjoy.

So it has been quite awhile since I have posted. Since I always post about school, I will just say that the semester is over. And that is a good thing, considering I survived it.

Semester: "Do you like that $#!^&*-Kicking I gave you, Joe?"
Joe: "Why yes, Mr. Semester, may I have another"

Except I don't want another. So I have a plan this time. It involves ferrets, two fine Italian folks named Vinny, and lots of Whiskey. You'll see. Suffice to say, it will all turn out smoothly.

Now, on to vacation. Christmas and New Years were both a blast. Nick and I got a PBR lamp with a man whose nose lights up, I got outfitted by the Compton Family Outdoors Store (more on that later) and we got to spend some time with Will, Meghan, and Liam in South Carolina. I read for pleasure, slept and ate more than I should have, hiked, played guitar, and generally did all of the things not allowed during school.

Well I must now cut this short. Its time to take my mom home after Vespers. Stay tuned for ADVENTURES AT THE WALLS OF JERICO, JOE READS A BOOK, and JOE AND JENN GO CAMPING.

All riveting, I assure you.

PS... my long post about Nick turning 21 did not show up for some odd reason. It was fun, and responsible. It is possible, you know.

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe