Today, I will tell you some useful facts about fevers.

1) When you have a fever, you should not trust your sense about what time of day it is. Currently it is 1:48pm, and I feel as if it is somehow last night.

2) When you have a fever, you should not trust your sense of where dreams stop and reality starts. Evidence: right before this post I was talking to Julie, the cat. And she was talking back. Normal, right? She was wearing a suit and speaking English with a heavy Spanish accent. Hmmmm...

3) Fevers make you hungry. Yet somehow, eating in your fever dreams satisfies that hunger. Evidence: I just ate a bunch of pancakes that we don't have. While talking to Julie.

4) When you have a fever, you apparently forget what a bed is. Evidence: After talking to Julie and eating Pancakes, I woke up on the floor.

5) Fevers over 102 degrees are bad. Like mine, which is 103 today.

6) AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe

oh yes, and

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SISTER HA LIZ!!!!

Yesterday, that is.

Peace,
Joe

Last night, as I squeezed the last of the toothpaste from the tube, I wondered,

"How much toothpaste is thrown away each year?"

Think about it. How many people out there really take the time to squash down the used portion of the tube until it is razor-flat just to get the very most toothpaste possible for your shopping dollar?

I know I do. But then again, I am odd in oh so many ways.
So that got me thinking about wasted toothpaste.

I bet there is someone somewhere that knows how much paste is wasted each year. Some statistician, not unlike myself, who takes pleasure in knowing such things. I bet further that this person works for some company or group that crusades against such waste. There are crusades for everything, so why not toothpaste wastage?

Maybe their name is something like People Against the Wasting of Toothpaste, or PAWT. Even better, maybe they are the Association Against the Wasting of Toothpaste, or AAWT. Say it with me, now: AAWT.

AAAAWWWTTTT.

Others obviously think like I do about these things. Just ask Stephani W.

Or those plucky folks who MAKE IT THEMSELVES.

I hope everyone is well.

Peace,
Joe

Do you ever find yourself bargaining with inanimate objects?

Well I do.

This morning I was taking a shower (so fresh and so clean, clean) when the water started to get colder. A common event in the winter, but today I wanted to end on a warm note. So, (outloud, mind you), I said

"Hey! I need more hot water. C'mon, you know we both want this to end well."

Shocked at myself for talking with the shower I follwed up this brilliant comment with,

"Holy crap. I just talked to the shower." (Again, outloud).

At this point, two facts occured to me:

1) The shower cannot hear me. Even if it could, it probably would not speak English, more likely some sort of appliance language, whatever that may be.

2) There was no point in lamenting my attempt at communication with a shower outloud at all, since no one was there but me.

So that is the way my day started. How was yours?

I hope everyone is well,
Peace,
Joe

What a weekend.

Imagine the following as a headline in your local newspaper:
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CHANDLER DOES MORE IN TWO DAYS THAN IN THE PREVIOUS SEVEN
February 7th

Joe Chandler had a busy weekend. Starting friday night he saw his girlfriend, worked a full day @ Mercedes, drove 6 hours to South Carolina, celebrated his oldest brothers birthday and Nephew's baptism, slept (a little) and drove back home in time for a full slate of meetings and class today.

"I'm pretty tired." he said today when caught face down at his office desk.

He denied having been sleeping in his office, claiming that the long string of "aaaaaa" on the computer screen was a grant proposal, not the result of his large head laying on the keyboard.

This is the first documented case where Mr. Chandler has gotten more done in two days than in the previous seven.

When asked how he did it, Mr. Chandler responded by mumbling something that sounded like, "mmmm, ham. No, no. Just five more minutes."

It remains to be seen if he can equal that produtivity in the coming days.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All true, I tells ya. And it is a grant proposal, damnit.

I had an incredible time this weekend. Jenn and I relaxed and cooked the Matar Panir ( an Indian dish that changes each time we cook it) on Friday night. D. LISH. The next day Nick and I worked a full day at Mercedes. Yep. Now Nick is in on it, too. Sunday we drove to Anderson for a combination Will Birthday / Liam Baptism. It was a wonderful time. Great food (as always), good churchin'. Peeg and Stacy were missed, but they called that night. They went to some crazy amusment park INSIDE in Japan. I hope they post about it. Liam was awesome during the actual Baptism, and I got to stand in as Godfather proxy (Fr. Donoho couldn't make it). Its always great to see so many loved ones in one weekend. Good times.

I think I'm going to get back to my "grant" now ("aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa")

I hope everyone is well.
Peace,
Joe